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View Article Parenting > General Parenting
Using the Television as a Teaching Tool Don't turn your family's television watching into a passive experience. Use TV programming and commercials as a chance to talk with your kids about what is important: values, character, problem-solving skills, and healthy self-image. And talk with your children about the difference between reality and pretend. Make sure they know that entertainment doesn't always provide the best examples of how to behave. Commercials We all know that commercials are designed to sell something. Unfortunately, they often use unhealthy messages about success, beauty, and sexuality. And while many times these messages are obvious, sometimes they are subtle. Talk with your kids about what they see in commercials and the underlying messages they are communicating. Here are some questions to get you started: What product was that commercial selling? What other messages was it selling? Do you think their claims are realistic (both for the product and the hidden message)? What do you believe is true success (or true beauty, true happiness, etc.)? Do you think this can be found in material objects? Do you think that car/outfit/toy will make someone truly happy or will it only bring temporary happiness? Where do we find true joy in life? Why do you think some people place so much importance on material objects? Where do you think our focus in life should be? Moral Dilemmas Most television shows involve a moral dilemma or problem that needs to be solved. Sometimes the characters try to solve the problem in wrong ways before they eventually make the right decision. As the character tries to cover up a mistake the wrong way or take the easy way out of a problem, talk with your children about the decisions he/she made. Try to get to the root of what motivates your children's decisions and actions. When viewing a situation involving choices, ask your children questions such as: What choices is he facing? Why do you think he is having a difficult time making the decision? What would you choose and why? If the character made a poor choice or took a short-cut, ask: Why do you think he made that choice? How did it affect the people around him? What were the consequences of his actions? What is the best way to correct his mistake? What did you learn from this show? What questions do you have about the situation the character was in? Violence and Risky Behaviors While many parents screen television shows for violence, language, and risky behaviors (such as drug and alcohol use, promiscuity, and reckless behavior), some of these images are bound to come through in even seemingly harmless shows or during promos for other shows. Instead of quickly turning the channel and pretending nothing happened, use this opportunity to bring up discussions about right and wrong, and how to handle peer pressure. Do you think that behavior was wrong? What are some of the dangers of doing that? Why do you think he listened to his friends instead of doing what he thought was right? How can you stand up to people who try to get you to do the wrong thing? How do our decisions affect other people? How can we make decisions that have positive outcomes? Do you think it was OK that those two kids got into a fight? In what other ways could they have solved their problem? How would you have handled that situation? What are the consequences of violence? Not-So-Reality Programming Most adults who watch reality TV know that the word "reality" is used loosely. What these shows present are not always a good representation of what real life is like. But children may not understand the difference between acting up for the camera and being real. Make sure they understand that just because someone on a show acts a certain way, it doesn't make him a role model or mean that it is an acceptable way to act. Use this as an opportunity to talk about how things are not always as they appear, and bridge that over to other media sources such as the Internet (including the people they may talk to online). What does stereotyping mean? Do you think these contestants/actors are playing up to a stereotype? Why do you think they are acting this way? Do you think these people are being genuine? Why is it important to act and talk the same way all the time? Why do you think some people pretend to be something they are not? Do you think this show is completely realistic? Do you think that maybe some of the people have been led to act in certain ways by the show's producers? Do you think they would act this way if they were not on television? Open Communication Don't be the only one to ask questions. Encourage your children to always ask questions about what they are watching, even if it may lead to some difficult topics. Share openly about your own beliefs and values, and encourage your children to apply their lessons in character to their own life. Talk about why your children are attracted to certain shows, and why they enjoy them so much. Discuss how they can stand strong against social pressures and ideals that don't match what you are teaching at home. Use the television as a chance to start talking with your kids, but don't let the open communication stop there. Make sure your kids know they can come to you at any time to talk about what they see or hear. Visit http://www.myfamilyminute.com for more free marriage, parenting, family life and fatherhood information and resources. Copyright by Family First 2007. All rights reserved.
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